I Love You More Than Your God Does

I won't torture you forever because of your nature.
I won't demand that you forsake your friends and family to curry my favour.
I won't obligate you to worship me.
I won't communicate with you in a way that can at best be described as cryptic, and at worst non-existent.
I won't order you to attack or kill people.
I won't require perfection of you to be around me.
I won't tell you to abandon rational thinking, and do what I say without reason.
I won't label you as unworthy, and then place it upon you to overcome my judgment.

I don't need or want any of that.
What am I?
I'm common human friendship.
And yes, that's right.
I love you more than your god does.

Fedoralingo Quiz

I thought I put this up a while ago, but I guess not. Well, here it is! Here what is, you ask? The Fedoralingo Quiz! Can't you read titles? What's "Fedoralingo?" you ask? Well, lemme tell ya! A "fedora" was a popular hat the fellas wore back in the 30's and 40's in the good ol' U.S. of A., see? A perfect symbol for the particular brand of slang, or "lingo," that they used back then.

So c'mon along and dip your toes into some fedoralingo! And feel free to make one of your own using whatever slang or regional dialect you happen to know!

1) Why, I oughta come on over there and give ya...

a) what for.
b) a piece of my mind.
c) a knuckle sandwich.

2) Get a load of...

a) the gams on that dame.
b) the stiffs in this rinky-dink gin joint.
c) the riffraff in this two-bit flophouse.

3) What's all the...

a) hubbub, bub?
b) ballyhoo, buddy-boy?
c) folderol, fellas?

4) You ain't so slick, ya big...

a) galoot!
b) lug!
c) chump!

5) You fellas got the skinny on...

a) that swanky new jalopy?
b) that snazzy little number?
c) that ritzy ol' broad?

(P.S. This is not actually a quiz, as any one of the answers given works fine for each question.)

Wafflecube

Inspired by Isaac's suggestion from March 5th on

http://twitter.com/ChaoticIsaac

I give you Wafflecube, the cake-stuffed wafflestructure. An important part of this balanced, nutritional brunch.
The tesseract version gave me indigestion.