(Reprint correction from previous issue "Devil Blames Elf for Carnage" - 1/15/07)
A written confession by Satan as deposed to the L.A.P.D. office of pre-representative interrogation:
I started talking to myself recently. Ya know, I tend to be quite a lonely guy. I must admit, being the Prince of Darkness doesn't put me at the top of the social calendar. With that I began to mumble to myself under my breath - breath of fire and brimstone, of course. ; ) My voice became clearer and louder, from a whisper to an evil, gravelly baritone. At first I couldn't make out what I was saying, but then it became overwhelming. I was telling myself to go out and commit acts of horrible, bloody flesh-churning violence. Not just telling - commanding. Without being fully cognizant of my actions, I turned suggestion into bone shattering reality. What was I to do but obey. Well, some may say "just don't obey", but they fail to realize just what a relentlessly manipulative terror I can be to a tortured, lonely, outcast soul such as myself. Long story short - limbs, guts, heads on poles. You get the picture. All because the Devil wouldn't take no for an answer. Even now I can hear the evil bastard ratting me out. Anyhooz, that's that in a nutshell.
© 2007 wjk It Becomes a Thing
