All The SpongeBobs

One Man/One Woman, Is vs. Ought

Proponents of one-man+one-woman (1M+1W) choose to use an “is” phrasing, to try and suggest some forgone conclusion of what they really intend to be an “ought” issue. Instead of, “marriage should be between one man and one woman only,” they opt for, “marriage is defined as between one man and one woman [only].” The choice of “is” over “ought” phrasing indicates they at least subconsciously recognize the weak if not wholly untenable nature of their position, as prescriptions are usually more easily assailable than descriptions. It's one step away from such dishonest assertions, that can also be heard from some of the more shit-witted supporters of these measures, as “A gay man can still marry a woman,” à la “Let the lions eat salad!”… As if. That is admittedly on the harsher side of the spectrum, but the more common occurrence can be exemplified by a recent twitter exchange I came across, wherein one person relies on this tactic, as well as to use semantics to mitigate obvious consequences.

“How about two consenting adults?”
“You can argue that, I just don’t think that’s what marriage IS.”

This allows him to erroneously extend the description as a definition.

“Anti-gay marriage laws discriminate against people that are gay, no?”
“No, they define marriage as the union of one man and one woman.”

In other words, the respondent chooses to blinder himself against the direct consequent.

So again, this serves to illustrate an unconscious (I’m trying to be generous here), acknowledgement that the 1M+1W concept is basted in lamesauce, seeking to palliate that fact ever so slightly with a shift from prescription to description.

The verbiage takes a brief but convenient pause from the unspoken "ought," at the unfortunately standard wording of many of these legal propositions, written as "shall be defined," continuing swiftly to the "is" of spoken usage and talking points. The shift is easy to breeze past, even in multiple steps. They’re hoping you won’t catch it. Indeed, I’m sure some of them are hoping they themselves won’t catch it.

With regard to 1M+1W, not only has the "is" not been established, the "ought" has been refuted from every angle. 
Tradition! Bible! Mrrrca! - refuted. 
Optimal child-rearing! Slippery slope! Moral and social decay! -demolished.

Find a sewer pipe, 1M+1W, you’re on the crap side of history.

A Natural Tendency toward Bisexuality

As we gain more & more control to shape our world and ourselves, biological pressures, such as the drive to reproduce will most likely become less central in defining our interpersonal relationships. Nowadays, and certainly in the future, reproduction will be less dependent on straight sex. The focus of sexual relationships of any kind has already moved beyond the purely reproductive, and solidly toward the emotional. This seems to be a direct consequence of the prosperity of civilization. As we free up time and resources that would otherwise have been rationed for necessities, such as food, shelter and reproduction, we can engage ourselves in what would otherwise be considered peripheral interests and self-edification: philosophy, art, personal expression, and non-reproductive sex. Our situations shape our drives. Without the pressure to reproduce or die, more and more aspects of sex move into the optional category. 

If you search "non-reproductive sex” on Google Scholar, you’ll see that there’s been a lot of research on how the environment, prosperous or impoverished, affects our bodies’ reproductive/sexual and chemical make-up.

Poorer communities, such as some in Appalachia tend to have more children, so as to increase the chances of survival in an environment of limited resources. More affluent societies, such as Japan, experience the opposite. Time and energy are freed up for non-reproductive/non-survival pursuits. As a consequence, physiology and psychology both adapt to accommodate the environment.

We have a sexual drive. We have a social-interactive-interpersonal relationship drive. The benefits of a gender exclusive sexual drive lessen when a society becomes prosperous, and able to maintain its numbers with less effort. The benefits of a widened social-interactive-inerpersonal relationship drive remain, and even sharpen with a possible increase in population, due to a decrease in mortality. The inclusion of the sexual aspect is reasonable for the interpersonal drive, in such societies.

This is why I’m of the opinion that both exclusively straight, and exclusively gay sexual orientations will diminish with prosperity, and most people will eventually be bisexual.
This is, of course, dependent on an overall maintenance or upswing in prosperity.
I also don’t think this will happen within individuals, but more so on a generational level. Although simply anecdotal, I’ve witnessed that the current younger generation is already much more physically/sensually interactive without consideration to gender than the one before mine. It seems that in a couple more generations, sexual orientation will become laxer still.

My motto is: No batteries! No cords!

Cool. I've always thought that devices should incorporate multiple means of recharging, the most obvious two (behind solar) being kinetic and ambient heat reclamation. I mean, smart phones already have mini accelerometers and gyroscopes, so it should be a natural progression. Much more reasonable than just allotting all the space to the giant, archaic, chemical soup vats from the 1970's that we call batt'ries. Oh, I'm sorry. That's right. "Batt'ries" are from the 40's. "Badduries" are from the 70's.

 

Energy gathering and reclamation methods might be from ambient sound and other EM fields. 

There is virtually no reason why a device need ever be out of power (apart, I suppose, from a full ejaculation, such as maybe a weapon discharge), and definitely no reason for cords. (The trouser style, I have little to no opinion on.)

Somebodies with the know-a-ma-how to make molecular/nano-sized gadgets, like they've already done with atomic level capacitors, and molecular motors, need to build a thingy that incorporates multiple cells of each of those concepts, to continuously charge a next generation of the battery. Since they would be so small and there would be millions of each in a system, they needn't even be in one chunky place, (i.e., battery), but instead could utilize any extraneous nooks and crannies, and be in and around, coating the particular components of a device that they're powering. The increased proximity of power source and component would very probably improve efficiency, due to the decrease in energy bleed over distance. 

So yeah. Somebody get on that.

Thanks to Tim for mentioning the thing at the link, and thanks to Guy for the link.

Future Guy

I love the idea of time capsules and language, so it's understandable I'd be interested in how people from the past intend to communicate with people (or whatevers) in the future. How might they be able to tell what items in a time capsule even are, or decipher the contrivances intended to make that task easier? Here's a graphical attempt by the Smithsonian to describe the sounds and structure of 1938 English. I like the mouth map, but the other graphics aren't exactly transparent.

Now this is going to be fun. If you don't think so, you may exit forthwith.

I'm going to play "(far far) future guy," and come at these graphics, not using the knowledge I have of how things are today.. or in 1938. I'll be a normal human of a completely new era, but as expected, without knowledge of English, or even any current conventions. We'll see if "future guy" can figure out what they mean.

Graphic 1) Mouth map 

(Future guy communicates efficiently through brain-linking technology. Speech apart from singing is pretty much foreign to him.) 

Initially thought the symbols were designations for parts of the oral cavity, but then remembered that the primary means of communication was verbal, as well as written. Symbols probably indicate the parts of the mouth used in producing a variety of sounds. How they might interact, if at all, is a mystery. Perhaps a separate device is applied to the interior of the mouth at each point in order to produce distinctly meaningful sounds.

Graphic 2) Stickmen

The recurrence of the symbol combination /ai/ most likely means:

person,being; action,acting; position, posing, or form.

Figure a) is in a lying position. 

Figure b) is sitting.

Figure c) is standing.

This is easy!

Figure d) is slouching.

Figure e) is jumping off, or stumbling forward.

Figure f) is marching with exaggerated limb positions.

What's that linear object?

Figure g) is riding or squatting.

Figure h) is not on knees, therefore probably not crawling. I'll go with searching for something. Perhaps even getting in a position to execute the maneuver in Figure i).

Figure i) is going up an incline.

Figure j) is going down an incline, or sliding.

Graphic 3) Concentric circles.

The central symbol groups indicating the superset concept seem to be in two related languages, with the same meaning. Probably indicative of the over-arching concept depicted by each graphic.

Three related concepts are indicated. from top to bottom:

a) outer, b) inner, c) center 

or perhaps, wave formants 

a) subsequent b) initial formant c) origin

May also be a crude representation of atomic structure, as their limited knowledge would allow.

Graphic 4) Very enigmatic.

I have no clue what this object is. It's obviously referring to the points of intricacy along the line segment. The center item seems to be the odd one out, as the other two are similar in structure.

-

Consultation and pattern matching suggest a representation of the planetary horizon, with structures upon it, and not a particular object or tool. 

The blackened portions may represent a particle emission, which is indicated by the broken lines above and extending to the left. Smoke or steam- Common in occurrence for the time period.

With scale and perspective taken into account, the other points of structure seem then to be centers of physical interaction; buildings, which were then organized into a pattern; cities. Most importantly, they are clustered *away* from the central structure.

-

Consultation and pattern matching suggest the central structure is a fabrication point; factory, as they were often depicted with such particle emitters.

-

Initial conclusion:

The graphic is somehow indicating the relationship between the factory being set apart from the cities, and how the particle emission tends toward one city over the other, probably dependent on wind and weather. Although not an issue worth mentioning now, the concept may have played an important role at the time, and therefore worthy of communicating. 

Depending on the level of metaphor, the symbols could indicate the designations for certain cities and a factory, or may stand for general concepts, such as:

a) receiver b) origin c) that which does not receive

a) downwind b) origin c) upwind

a) object b) agent c) alternate

-

Further consultation and research indicates initial conclusion most likely to be erroneous. The center structure is an ocean-going vessel, and the cities are points between which the vessel is travelling. This leads to the symbols most probably indicating:

a) origin b) means(of travel) c) destination, 

or with a difference in mode,

a) from b) by c) to/toward

Graphic 5) A common gestural greeting.

Most probably represents a form of gestural ritual, performed at initial contact; a greeting. 

The function of the lower body coverings is not apparent, but note that they are alike. 

The head coverings, or perhaps hair, is different. The individuals are otherwise alike. I take this to mean that the greeting represented is for people who are common to each other in most ways, but differ in a few. This would indicate that the greeting may be repeated, or habitual, as people generally grouped together according to common characteristics, in that time. 

The disembodied arm may indicate a variant arm position, or perhaps one following or preceding the other gestural combinations. 

The symbol arrangements here seem to indicate that the gestural positions for each hand have special designations. It's unclear what the set/subset relationship for the reoccurrence of the 'ai' combination is, but this graphic would seem to support its translation as 'position'. 

There are two superset concepts depicted in this graphic. Most probably the symbols indicating the group of gestures performed by each person, as they seem to be two different but related sets.

Graphic 6) binary relationship of light reflection. 

Figures are arranged in three sets of two. The first two represent people. It's unclear whether they are all to represent specific people/objects, or concepts. Maybe it's a mix of both. They definitely form couplings; pairs that go together, or have a common relationship with one another. 

Following the pattern 'a is to b as c is to d' renders a possible common property for indicating light reflection. 

A head with less hair on top reflects more light than one with more hair on top, for the light-skinned persons depicted. The beard on the one person, by contrast, may signify the emphasis on head hair, rather than facial hair.

The second pair shows the concept of 'less' and 'more', in the same a/b pattern.

The light rectangle would reflect more than the dark one.

The importance in communicating this concept may be to stress that for each object/person classification, different groups of symbols are used to convey the same concept. It has been fairly well substantiated that communication of this period often employed multiple symbol combinations for the same concept. The superset concept is most likely indicated by the group of symbols showing representations in the two related languages, and apparently applicable to all figures represented.

---

And thus, future guy pretty much fails at translation. At least he didn't try to link everything to concepts of worship, religion, and ancient gods.

McMohammed

Is it blasphemy day yet? .. It is now.

McMohammed (PBUH (Processed Beef Upon Him))- Face not shown, as it's hidden by clown make-up!

All nuggets slaughtered as cruelly and hallallallly as possible.

Click on image to supersize it! You know the drill.

The Bizarre Test

From a recent YouTube video by atheistcoffee.

At least it doesn't say, "Oriental"

McDonald's's limited time offers- The McRib, the Shamrock Shake, and now apparently, the Asian Burrito. Although nowhere on the menu, witness the cousin to the burrito I featured on June 11th, 2011. This time, the little round sticker used to swaddle my breakfast proudly proclaims its ethnicity! After consuming this paragon of nutrition, I could only conclude that the integral though solitary part of the burrito that was Asian, was the sticker.
Go out and get yours today, before Disney puts it back in the vault.

Bible Thumper

This is for you, Bill O Reilly.

-Ables 18: Uncrustables

Just in case you didn't catch on already, kids, this product is COOL! It says so right in the advertisement. Like our good friends the Toastables, these treats are also pre-toasted. It says so right on the box. You need only "Thaw' n Serve". Good thing they excised the 'a' and 'd' from the word 'and' and replaced them with an apostrophe stuck to the word thaw. It saves so much space. It's also much cooler, kids. It says so right there in the corner. Would an obviously also cool, arbitrary cartoon dude lie to you? Hardly. I'm not going to wager what trepidations might ensue if one were to serve them without first thawing, but why take chances.

I love this product! Mostly because it's so cool. 

I just have one question. Or, one question in two antipodal segments. Am I to take it that this item of merchandise is not crustable, whatever that might mean, or is it able to be uncrusted, whatever that might mean? If the former, then I suppose you either may not or cannot attach crust back onto the product. And if the latter, I assume the product allows for removing an otherwise undetectable crust from its individual units. Since there seems to be no discernible remnant of crust on the product, and indeed, that fact appears to be its champion feature, I'm going to have to conclude that some measure has been taken to ensure that no possible crust reattachment is ventured post-retail.  

I may also be overreaching in my interpretation here, but this commodity gives the impression of possible inclusion in a picnic, given the checkered background often incorporated into such things as picnic tablecloths and blankets. I'd be game to try it, but would definitely remember to thaw.